Monday, June 29, 2015

Oregon, My Oregon

Despite contracting a stomach bug one week before returning to Oregon, I anxiously packed up and shipped out of the "Luxury" Homestead Apartments.  I had been feeling very melancholy about leaving my new-found friends and also my daughter, but as we put hundreds of miles behind us and the landscape revealed grazing animals and thick stands of trees, I started to feel something new yet familiar.  I began to yearn to walk barefoot through green grass, drive on a two-lane country road, stroke the wooly coats of farm animals, and even flinch at the random shots of varmint-huntin' neighbors.  As I crested another curve in the Siskyous and was met with the "Oregon Welcomes You" sign, I actually teared up. 
 

We have a saying in our house.  "Wherever you go, there you are."  That is to say, don't blame your problems on circumstances or other people.  You are still the common factor in all of this.  There is a more positive and encouraging, but related message in Psalm 139:7-10. 

"Where can I go from your Spirit?  Where can I flee from your presence?  If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast."

The message is: Where ever you go, God is with you.   And of course, California was no exception (though some may argue it as God-forsaken - just saying).  There were many places I saw and felt God's presence.  Here are a few:

*The office person for our section of the apartment complex always had a Bible verse written on the board in her office.  No matter how many times we complained about things she was always smiling, kind and understanding.

*Zumba!  Yes, moving your body and sweating can be a spiritual experience.  Well, mostly the camaraderie of my fellow perspirers.  The teacher also blessed me with her kindness, enthusiasm and let's just be honest, the price of the class:  free!

*Old friends and relatives.  I was within oinking distance (inside joke) of my sister and her family, and food-consuming distance of an old middle school friend.

*Biola University.  Ever since the first time I set foot on the campus, I felt like I was in God's living room.  The place exudes love, joy, peace -- yes, all the fruit of the spirit.  Of course they aren't perfect, but I've never had more fun hanging out with college students. 

So of course on my return, God is here in Oregon too.  I feel different now, though, and somehow more exposed.  Months before I left Oregon, God was stripping down my responsibilities, activities and obligations.  I have been trying to put a description on how I feel about that and just figured it out today in my daily devotion.  I was reading about Adam and Eve and their big bust.  After their eyes were opened to right and wrong they looked down and noticed that "one of these things is not like the other."

Oh hey, that reminds me of a joke!  A preacher in town went out to visit a new parishioner to welcome her.  When he walked up to the house, her car was in the driveway and lights were on.  He knocked on the door but no one answered.  He walked around to the side to see if he could see someone inside.  He knocked again but no one answered.  He took out his business card and wrote on it, "Revelation 3:20."  That verse says, "Here I am! I stand at the door and knock.  If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me."  He slipped it under the door and left.  The next Sunday, his same card was found in the offering plate.  Curious he looked at it and noticed something written on the back of it.  It simply said, "Genesis 3:10."  Puzzled, he looked up the reference.  "I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid."

So back to Eve, no, that wasn't the revelation I had. It's that I feel naked, stripped down, completely uncovered and vulnerable.  Over the years I've had the bad habit of taking pride in my titles:  Mom, Mrs. Head Coach, Sunday School Teacher, Bible Study Leader, Women's Ministry Leader, Racquetball Player, Fundraiser, Budget Committee Member.  I've taken my identity from these club memberships, so to speak, rather than simply being a child of God, wonderfully and fearfully made in the image of God, designed to do good works for Him...but not to take credit for them.  It made me think of Isaiah 64:6: "...all our righteous acts are like filthy rags..."

I hate being naked, literally and figuratively.  There is no hiding the essence of who you are.  And as a side note, let me just make this recommendation for anyone over 40.  Don't ever get the hand mirror to look at the back and see what's been happening back there. Just imagine those images on the news of muddy landslide disasters.  Ignorance is bliss and in this case, knowledge is agony.  So how to cover myself again?

For he has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of righteousness.  Isa. 61:10

He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted...to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. Isa 61:1, 3

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.  He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge.  Psalm 91:1, 4

Rather, clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the sinful nature.  Romans 13:14

You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy. Psalm 30:11

You are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus, for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ.  Galations 3:26-27

A song was brought to mind that I have never sung in church, but I believe Billy Graham always played this song when he gave the invitation to people to come forward:  Just As I Am.  The fifth verse goes like this:

Just as I am, poor, wretched, blind;
sight, riches, healing of the mind,
yea all I need in thee to find,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.

Whether in California or Oregon I can go just as I am, without titles, importance, or even wealth.  "...even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast."

 
Back on the farm



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